Transforming the Living Legacy of Trauma is Not Literally What This Article is About

War survivor • Trauma •Victim

That’s the name of a workbook I was given recently and started thinking…

I will tell you about this workbook in a minute tho. Let me introduce myself first so I can kick start my medium writing which will probably be low on a scale of low, medium, high. Lowdium at best.

I am a war survivor. I spent terrible four years in the most unimaginable environment as a teenager, not a soldier, in Bosnia. I have a narcissistic mother who chose me as her scapegoat to gift me years of abuse, oh and let’s not forget that uncle. Ugh, that uncle.

Lots of shit has happened to me from age eight. I am 42 if you must know but I look 41. I like life, people, animals, traveling, reading, long hikes, ice climbing and ice cream.

I am a terrible writer. But you know that about me by now. I am here to tell you what you don’t know about me. Let’s see, what else? Ummmm I speak three languages, love cooking, socializing only before 8 PM. Brunch is my jamjam.

Ok so since you read all that up there, you deserve an applause. I will write on medium about all my experiences in life and personal opinions but it won’t be the most popular “how to do this or that” or “five ways to do this or that” you will either get something out of it or not. Like a memoir mixed with life reviews of shit around me.

Ok so what about this workbook: Transforming the Living Legacy of Trauma.

My therapist suggested we do it together.

Review of therapist: I love my therapist. He is amazing.

Review of the workbook: Workbook reminds me of all the other workbooks, there to help understand the why and give a reader a few tools as to how. With over 500 hours of therapy behind me, I have been down this road a million times. Oh, I should not throw numbers around; now you might be thinking ‘ma Gawd’ after all that reading and time; she is still not spiritually awake or whatever the kids call it these days. I don’t hold the secret recipe of life, no. I am still working my shit out. I only recently started opening up about it. I hid behind my toxic job for as long as I could.

But back to book review.

One major issue I came across is the overuse of words like:

TRAUMA +SURVIVOR +VICTIM

it is not just this book and this is not a bad review of the book it self. Just reminded me how much I dislike those words, they don’t fit. Feel incorrect and almost rude.

I suggest we start a movement. It is about time we change mental health words.

Survivor to VANQUISHER

Victim to WUNDED

Trauma to UNHEALTHY EVENT

Why? Because to me survivor is someone that leaves dead/death behind- vanquisher is the one that defeats enemy.

Victim is a description for a dead person too, harmed or injured VS Wounded is a not yet dead person- there is still hope :)

Lastly, Trauma- ugh what a heavy loaded word. How about calling it unhealthy event because it gives glimpse into the opposite – healthy. I know trauma can best describe some shit but even saying “deeply distressing event” sounds better to me.

What if we started using these words in therapy, on the news, in books and change this shit up? I think it would make a difference in healing and respect for the Vanquisher who kicked the unhealthy events ass, wounded but not defeated.

Anyway, I am done for now. More on this and other topics in my next mambo jambo post. :) Follow me. I got things to tell you.

Ciao drugari (bye friends)